New ordinance requires verified flue clearance before Christmas Eve, delighting nobody A New Permit Joins... The post County Issues ‘Chimney Access’ Permits for Beachfront Homes, Backlog Forms appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Charlotte Campbell (Surfer's Paradise)

Snaking and dropping in reportedly reclassified as coal-eligible offenses ahead of the holiday A New... The post Santa’s Naughty List Now Tracks Wave-Etiquette Violations, Locals Panic appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Lotte De Jong (Palos Verdes)

North Pole cites favorable jurisdiction as elves trade fur-lined boots for skate decks North Pole... The post Santa Relocates Workshop to Venice Beach for the Tax Advantages appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Skipper Badenhorst (Jeffrey's Bay)

Meteorologists add festive variable to models as workshop denies any involvement Forecasters Introduce a Festive... The post Surf Forecast Now Includes ‘Santa Swell’ After North Pole Pressure System appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Celeste Bisset (El Segundo)

Workshop labor dispute spills onto the sand as workers seek paid time to check the... The post Elves Unionize at San Clemente Surf Shop, Demand ‘Dawn Patrol Provisions’ appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Blessica Malapitan (Cloud 9)

Leaked recording reveals officials questioning the North Pole’s delivery metrics and demanding redistricting A Recording Surfaces LOS ANGELES — A leaked audio recording has plunged the Los Angeles City Council into fresh controversy this week, capturing several officials disparaging what they called the underperforming district served by Santa Claus, questioning the North Pole’s delivery metrics, and floating a proposal to redistrict the...

North Pole cites liability concerns as engineers flag the region’s masonry flues as ‘aspirational at best’ A New Standard for Descent LOS ANGELES — Citing mounting liability concerns, the North Pole has announced that Santa Claus will no longer descend any Los Angeles chimney that has not passed a seismic retrofit inspection, a requirement that engineers warn could exclude a substantial portion of the region’s older masonry flues,...

Executives confirm the character will be ‘reimagined for a modern audience,’ with three spinoffs already in development Santa, the Franchise LOS ANGELES — A major Hollywood studio has acquired the rights to develop Santa Claus into a feature film, confirming plans for a gritty reboot, a sprawling cinematic universe, and at least three spinoffs already in development, in a deal executives described as reimagining the beloved character for...

Saint Nick offered a spot at the bar in six weeks as the host fails to recognize the most famous man on Earth No Table for Saint Nick LOS ANGELES — Santa Claus was denied a table at the city’s most coveted restaurant this week, informed by an unmoved host that the wait was indefinite, that no reservations were available for the foreseeable future, and that he might, if he was willing to wait six weeks, be offered a spot at the bar, an...

Saint Nick credits a morning ice bath and an elimination diet for his improved delivery performance A New Regimen for the North Pole LOS ANGELES — In what wellness influencers are hailing as a transformative embrace of optimization, Santa Claus has adopted a comprehensive Los Angeles wellness routine, crediting a daily cold plunge, an elimination diet, and a rigorous program of self-optimization for what he describes as a marked improvement...

Weather bureau requests removal of the eight-story figure obstructing its view of the West Philippine... The post Mall of Asia Installs World’s Largest Santa, Accidentally Blocks Typhoon Radar appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Lourdes Tiu

North Pole confirms dietary adaptation as Saint Nick embraces local hospitality with alarming enthusiasm A... The post Santa Switches From Milk and Cookies to Taho and Three-in-One Coffee appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Mykaelah Santos

Saint Nick spends nine hours answering questions about his sleigh, his elves, and a senator’s... The post Senate Summons Santa to Hearing ‘In Aid of Legislation,’ No Legislation Results appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Jocephyne Santos

North Pole admits the beloved crooner’s seasonal dominance over Filipino radio is simply insurmountable A... The post Santa Loses Christmas Airwaves to Jose Mari Chan, Concedes He Never Stood a Chance appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Rachel Diaz

Local official unveils tarpaulin thanking himself for gifts he played no role in providing A... The post Barangay Captain Claims Personal Credit for Santa’s Annual Deliveries appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Lourdes Tiu

San Clemente’s Celebrated Break Gets Sixteenth International Recognition as Final Forty Car Park Spaces Disappear... The post Trestles Named World’s Best Wave Again; Locals Still Cannot Park appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Gina Mann

Foam and Log Revival Sweeps Venice and Malibu Hearts of Men Who Have Given Up... The post Southern California Longboard Revival Baffles Everyone Who Wanted Shortboarding to Win appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Adéla Novotný (Castle Rock Beach)

Paddleboarders Cite Seventeen Incidents of Meaningful Eye Contact and Three Instances of Loud Sighing SUP... The post SUP Owners Association Petitions California Coastal Commission for Separate Ocean appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Fox News

Hyped Winter Swell Produces Eight Good Days, Record Crowds, and an Unbroken Queue for the... The post El Nino Promises Best Surf Season in Decades, Delivers Mostly Parking Problems appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Linda Mcintosh

Twenty-Three-Year-Old Describes Original Stall-and-Lock to Five Separate People Before Museum Confirms It Has a Display... The post Venice Beach Surfer Convinced He Invented Move That Has Existed Since 1962 appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: View all posts by Business Wire

$12 Digital Parking Experience Promises Seamless Entry, Delivers Forty-Five Minute Queue Requiring Three Different Screens Dodger Stadium Replaces Non-Working Parking Lot With Non-Working Parking App LOS ANGELES — Dodger Stadium unveiled Thursday its new digital parking management system, a smartphone-based platform designed to replace the previous system of cash-and-paper parking that stadium officials described as “outdated and...

West Hollywood Restaurant Confirms Three-Hour Queue for Table, Forty-Five Minute Wait for Coffee, Two-Week Advance Booking for Outdoor Seating WeHo Brunch Waitlist Now Longer Than Most Medical Procedures WEST HOLLYWOOD — A West Hollywood restaurant that has achieved what food writers describe as “destination brunch status” — a designation meaning the queue to get in is now a leisure activity in its own right — confirmed this week that...

Independent Investigation Reveals Seven Westside Markets Share 94 Percent of Vendors, Products, and Artisanal Attitude Silver Lake Resident Completes Sixth Farmers Market of the Week, Discovers It Is the Same Farmers Market LOS ANGELES — A Silver Lake resident who describes herself as “someone who takes farmers markets seriously” completed her sixth market visit of the week on Sunday before making a discovery that she characterises as...

New $12 Million Fire-Resistant Structure Features Concrete Walls, Steel Roof, and Sight Lines That Have Eliminated Two Adjacent Properties from View Malibu Celebrity Builds Fireproof Mansion So Thoroughly Neighbours Cannot Find Their Houses MALIBU — A celebrity whose publicist has asked that we not name them but whose recent construction project has been the subject of seventeen planning commission meetings, four neighbour complaints, one...

Unanimous Vote Praises Members for Showing Up, Sitting Down, and on Several Occasions Remaining Awake... The post Philippine Congress Passes Resolution Commending Philippine Congress for Hard Work appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Carla Reyes

New Digital Infrastructure Demands QR Code Literacy, App Download Patience, and a Phone Charged Above... The post Makati CBD Unveils Smart City Initiative That Requires Citizens to Be Smarter Than the City appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Hazel Nuñez

LTFRB Sources Confirm Vehicle Has Been Technically Legal for Fourteen Years Due to Classification as... The post Filipino Family Packs Seventeen People Into Seven-Seater Van, Calls It Bonding appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Alan Nafzger

PAGASA Releases Seven-Day Outlook Covering All Meteorological Conditions Simultaneously, Describes This as Science Philippine Weather... The post Philippine Weather Bureau Forecasts Week of Rain, Sunshine, and Profound Uncertainty appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Shaiyenne Garcia

Commission on Audit Confirms Imaginary Infrastructure Now Legally Obligated to Comply with Real Regulations Philippine... The post Philippine Senate Approves Bill Requiring All Ghost Projects to File Environmental Impact Statements appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Bill Wittliff

The Unfulfilled Promise: Pasay's Quest for Consumer Happiness on Camera -- Analyzing the Digital Documentation of Buyer's Remorse and Product Mediocrity in Metro Manila The post The Unfulfilled Promise: Pasay’s Quest for Consumer Happiness on Camera appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Rheychell Gomez

Makati High-End Personal Smart Umbrella Vetting: The 'Aggressive Shelter' and the Shame of the Simple Canopy -- When Your Weather Tool Is a High-Cost, Vetted Asset and Your Aesthetics Are Viciously Protected The post Makati High-End Personal Smart Umbrella Vetting: The ‘Aggressive Shelter’ and the Shame of the Simple Canopy appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Tina Mercado

Makati Corporate Head Office Executive Private Feng Shui Master Vetting Strategy (The Aggressive Flow): The Aggressive Security and the Shame of the Simple Compass -- When Your Energetic System Is a Vicious Hierarchy and Your Aesthetics Are a High-Cost, Vetted Asset The post Makati Corporate Head Office Executive Private Feng Shui Master Vetting Strategy (The Aggressive Flow): The Aggressive Security and the Shame of the Simple Compass appeared...

Makati Executive's Preferred Brand of Noise-Dampening Office Headset: The 'Aggressive Hush' and the Shame of the Simple Earbud -- When Your Input Is a High-Cost Statement and Your Sound Profile Is Viciously Vetted for Quiet The post Makati Executive’s Preferred Brand of Noise-Dampening Office Headset: The ‘Aggressive Hush’ and the Shame of the Simple Earbud appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Lourdes Tiu

Makati Executive's Preferred Brand of High-End Desk Tape Dispenser: The 'Aggressive Adhesion' and the Shame of the Simple Rip -- When Your Document Tool Is a High-Cost Statement and Your Aesthetics Are Viciously Vetted for Perfection The post Makati Executive’s Preferred Brand of High-End Desk Tape Dispenser: The ‘Aggressive Adhesion’ and the Shame of the Simple Rip appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Lourdes Tiu

New Tier System: Please Be Careful, Mom Is On The Phone, The Pier Is Gone... The post Coastal Commission Demands Surfers Acknowledge The High Surf Advisory appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Adéla Novotný (Castle Rock Beach)

Lucas Taub Presents Laminated 47-Point Hero Onboarding Document Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file... The post Surf Coach Hailed As Hero Now Demands Hero Treatment Forever appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Laylan Connelly

New CrowdIQ metric rates break conditions from 1 (manageable) to 10 (stay home, call a... The post LA County Surf Forecasting App Now Includes Crowd Stupidity Index Alongside Wave Height appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Bella Rossi (Hermosa Beach)

City ordinance would require written exam, water test, and signed declaration that applicant knows what... The post Newport Beach Proposes Mandatory Surf Competency Licence After Third Foam Board Collision This Month appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Giselle Müller (Venice Beach)

WSA Conversational Surfing Credential aims to legitimise the estimated 4 million Americans who own boards... The post Surf Industry Introduces Official Certification for People Who Talk About Surfing Without Actually Surfing appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Skipper Badenhorst (Jeffrey's Bay)

Bronze monuments explain right-of-way rules, drop-in consequences, and the concept of reading a wave in... The post Long Beach Installs Surf Etiquette Plaques Along Beachfront in Multi-Lingual Awareness Campaign appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Isabella Velásquez (Playa Del Rey)

Three-day conference produces 40-page report blaming shortboarders, longboarders, SUP riders, tourists, and unseasonably warm water... The post Laguna Beach Surf Culture Symposium Agrees That Everyone Else Is The Problem appeared first on Surfing LA. Go to Source Author: Gracie Evans (Cornwall UK)

Terra Incognita campaign reaches demographics described as entirely uncontaminated by prior knowledge or travel expectations... The post Philippine Tourism Board Targets Travellers Who Have Never Heard of the Philippines appeared first on Manila News. Go to Source Author: Dalagang Filipina Panganiban